Beware of Wonder Woman

No, I don't mean that Lynda Carter is out to get you. I am speaking more of an expectation we women put on ourselves. We think we have to be Wonder Woman.  I have been there. And it is exhausting. Not to mention that after having five kids, the costume is kind of uncomfortable.

How do we measure if we are a good mom for our kids? Simple, we ask God to examine our hearts and show us where we need to improve as mothers.

Simple...but I confess it isn't/wasn't usually the first thing I do. What's the first thing we usually do? We compare ourselves to other women.

• She always has it so together.
• Her house is always spotless.
• Her kids are so smart.

So what's wrong with comparing ourselves to others? Because that is not how God works. He doesn't compare us to others. He holds us accountable for only how each one of us is obedient to Him. 

However, there seems to be this trend in our culture that our worth is measured by how much we can handle or endure. So if I have more stress in my life that must mean I am doing more important things than others are. And because I can handle all this stress, bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan...I am Wonder Woman. But...that makes it all about me.

There is now a t-shirt that men can get that says their wife is Wonder Woman. While I truly appreciate these men supporting their wives and being proud of them, I think we better be careful.  That's more pressure to be this perfect woman who can handle any challenge in her own strength.

And I say this because I used to have the Wonder Woman syndrome. I wanted to people to admire just how much I could handle. Why? Oh, because that determined my worth as a mother and wife.

Wrong.

I recently watched the movie Mom's Night Out which was very entertaining and I enjoyed it.  But it started me to think about why this woman would feel so stressed. And what does "stressed" really mean? We use it fairly often and casually in our culture.

Here is what a dictionary said the word means:

a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances

Ew. That is not what I want for my life. I hope it isn't what you want for yours. If we examine our lives, we will find a lot of the "stress" in our lives are of our own making. For example, in that movie, many of the things that were stressing her out were only there because she wasn't discipling her kids. Granted, the behavior shown was over-the-top for comedic effect, but I know I have created stress by not being a consistent parent with my kids. Surely God doesn't want our lives to be consumed by stress.

Here is what God says He wants for us:

"Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."

          John 14:27 

Much better, right?

Of course, we do have demanding circumstances in our lives. We are in a sin-cursed world. God does allow us to experience hard times. Contrary to a popular saying that God doesn't give us more than we can handle, He actually does. Because He wants you to come to Him and let Him handle it for you. For Him to be glorified from the experience.

         "Casting all your care upon Him; for He careth for you." 

           1 Peter 5:7

If I have this goal to be a Wonder Woman wife and mom, where does God fit in? When does He get the credit He deserves for giving me the ability to be the wife/mom that I am? Or for the fact that He carried me through the challenges I have faced?

My life should be pointing people to Him. Trying to be Wonder Woman only points back at me.

Find Us Faithful

Our church has been learning new songs and some of them really minister to me. However, I'm not one to toss out our old songs. Since I'm a girl from the 80's, I still have several favorites from that era. One of them is the Steve Green song, Find Us Faithful.

I have sung this song before in church services. I have always loved the words. The chorus has wonderful words:

O, may all who come behind us find us faithful

May the fire of our devotion light their way

May the footprints that we leave

Lead them to believe

And the lives we live inspire them to obey

 I dusted off this song the other day and these words hit me in a new way, especially toward the end:

After all our hopes and dreams have come and gone

And our children sift through all we've left behind

May the clues that they discover and the memories they uncover

become the light that leads them to the road we each must find

Now that my mom has passed away, these words have a more powerful and personal meaning to me. My sisters and I have sifted through what Mom left behind. Although we all already have a personal relationship with Jesus, the clues Mom left behind would have led us to Him.

Only Daughter received one of Mom's Bibles. There are a multitude of hand-written notes in the covers and margins.

This is a note where she had written my name and a date. The ink has blurred over the years, but I think it says "July 77".  The verse is Psalm 48:14 which says, "For this God is our God for ever and ever: He will be our guide even unto death."  I think she wrote that as a verse she was claiming for me while we were on furlough back here in the states.

These notes here are some of my favorite. These are verses she claimed for our family's ride home in the summer of 1977. My parents were serving on the mission field in Okinawa. We had flown back to the states on furlough. However, we had a little trouble getting back to Okinawa. We were using the Space Available service with military flights. At this point of time, my dad was retired, so we were hardly the first on the list to get seats. And trying to get six seats altogether...almost an impossible task. Almost, that is. But God did have a flight for us. However, we spent twenty-one days living in the terminal at Travis Air Force Base in California before that flight. We got to know people while there. I was very young at the time, so my memories are quite clouded and limited. However, knowing my parents, they were probably ministering to those around them. I love how Mom claimed a verse for each of us during that wait.

That is one of the memories I have sifted through. And yes, I have found Mom to be faithful. Now the task at hand is to leave the same for my children.

I Know The Plans I Have For You

I decided to pull an old song out of my itunes. In fact, it has been so long since I've listened to it, I haven't moved it over to my laptop yet, and I've had that for some time now.

♫ The song is "I Know The Plans I Have For You" by LordSong. I love this song! I'm listening to it and wondering why I've forgotten about it!  ♪

This song encourages me when I choose to let worry and/or fear invade my life.

My mind knows that God may not answer a prayer request right away, but in His timing. My mind knows that...but do I live it? I will offer my little concern up to Him and step away and actually know I have placed it in His hand. But then a day goes by, a week, a month....and I don't see any answer. However, that doesn't mean it isn't coming.

 I know the plans He has for me are better than any I could have for myself. My little concern may not fit into His plan or may not fit at this time. I just have to keep walking with Him and rest in the fact that He will take care of me.  He wants to bring hope to my life.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray not me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.     Jeremiah 29:11-13 

The song mentions hearing God say this promise again and again. Well, that's my fault He's having to say it more than once. I let go of His promise and started worrying! Verse 13 says to seek Him with all your heart. Obviously, I was not seeking Him so that left time to give into worry.

Why would God bother with "fearfully and wonderfully" making me if He was not planning to take care of my future? Why would He bother to provide a way for me to spend eternity with Him if He wasn't going to take care of me here on earth?  He wouldn't.  He has taken care of me. He takes care of me now. He will take care of me in the future.

If you don't know God, I hope you will seek Him. Allow Him to show you the plans He has for you.✟